Things In General

Funny Commercial!

2009-04-08T03:25:00.000-07:00

A Giant Of A Man....

2009-01-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

An incredible young man. Don't miss this one out.
Make sure your speakers are on:

Puppy In The Mirror

2008-12-08T08:44:00.000-08:00

Truths About Life....

2008-11-24T03:08:00.000-08:00

Truths About Life

Some truths about life that children have learned

1. No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats

2. When your Mom is mad at your Dad, don't let her brush your hair

3. If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person

4. Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato

5. You can't trust dogs to watch your food

6. Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair

7. Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time

8. You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk

9. Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts

10. The best place to be when you're sad is Grandpa's lap

Some truths about life that adults have learned

1. Raising teenagers is like nailing Jelly to a tree

2. Wrinkles don't hurt

3. Families are like fudge . . .mostly sweet, with a few nuts

4. Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held its ground

5. Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside

6. Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fibre, not the toy

Truths about life about growing old

1. Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional

2. Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get

3. When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there

4. You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster

5. It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions

6. Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician

7. Wisdom comes with age, but sometimes age comes alone

Trick? questions

1. Do they have a 4th of July in England ?
2. How many birthdays does the average man have?
3. Some months have 31 days; how many have 28?
4. A woman gives a beggar 50 pence; the woman is the beggar's sister, but the beggar is not the woman's brother. How come?
5. Why can't a man living in the USA be buried in Canada ?
6. You are participating in a race. You overtake the second person. What position are you in?
7. Is it legal for a man in California to marry his widow's sister? Why?
8. Two men play five games of checkers. Each man wins the same number of games. There are no ties. Explain this.
9. Divide 30 by 1/2 and add 10. What is the answer?
10. A man builds a house rectangular in shape. All sides have southern exposure. A big bear walks by, what colour is the bear? Why?
11. If there are 3 apples and you take away 2, how many do you have?
12. I have two coins totalling 55 pence. One is not a 50 pence piece. What are the coins?
13. If you have only one match and you walked into a room where there was an oil burner, a kerosene lamp, and a wood burning stove, which one would you light first?
14. How far can a dog run into the woods?
15. A doctor gives you three pills telling you to take one every half hour. How long would the pills last?
16. A farmer has 17 sheep, and all but 9 die. How many are left?
17. How many animals of each sex did Moses take on the ark?
18. A clerk in the butcher shop is 5' 10'' tall. What does he weigh?
19. How many two pence stamps are there in a dozen?
20. What was the Prime Ministers name in 1970?

ANSWERS

1. yes (they also have a 3rd of July, a 2nd of July, etc...)
2. one a year
3. all months have (at least) 28 days
4. the beggar is the woman's sister
5. because he is living
6. If you answered that you are first, then you are
absolutely wrong! If you overtake the second person and you take his place, you are second!
7. no. the man would be dead
8. they are not playing each other
9. 70 (30 divided by .5 is 60)
10. white. (the bear would be a polar bear, because the house must be at the north pole)
11. 2 (you just took 2 apples)
12. a fifty pence piece, and a 5 pence piece (one is not a 50 pence piece but the other one is)
13. light the match first
14. half way (then he would be running out)
15. one hour (the first one, a half hour later, and another one more half hour)
16. 9 (all but 9 die...)
17. none. Moses was not on the ark
18. he weighs meat
19. 12
20. Gordon Brown

Christmas downsizing

Today's global challenges require the North Pole to continue to look for better, more competitive steps. Effective immediately, the following economy measures are to take place in the 'Twelve Days of Christmas' subsidiary:

The partridge will be retained, but the pear tree never turned out to be the cash crop forecasted. It will be replaced by a plastic hanging plant, providing considerable savings in maintenance.

The two turtle doves represent a redundancy that is simply not cost effective. In addition, their romance during working hours could not be condoned. The positions are therefore eliminated.

The three French hens will remain intact. After all, everyone loves the French.

The four calling birds were replaced by an automated voice mail system, with a call waiting option. An analysis is underway to determine who the birds have been calling, how often and how long they talked.

The five golden rings have been put on hold by the Board of Directors. Maintaining a portfolio based on one commodity could have negative implications for institutional investors. Diversification into other precious metals as well as a mix of T-Bills and high technology stocks appear to be in order.

The six geese-a-laying constitutes a luxury which can no longer be afforded. It has long been felt that the production rate of one egg per goose per day is an example of the decline in productivity. Three geese will be let go, and an upgrading in the selection procedure by personnel will assure management that from now on every goose it gets will be a good one.

The seven swans-a-swimming is obviously a number chosen in better times. Their function is primarily decorative. Mechanical swans are on order. The current swans will be retrained to learn some new strokes and therefore enhance their outplacement.

As you know, the eight maids-a-milking concept has been under heavy scrutiny by the EEOC. A male/female balance in the workforce is being sought. The more militant maids consider this a dead-end job with no upward mobility. Automation of the process may permit the maids to try a-mending, a-mentoring or a-mulching.

Nine ladies dancing has always been an odd number. This function will be phased out as these individuals grow older and can no longer do the steps.

Ten Lords-a-leaping is overkill. The high cost of Lords plus the expense of international air travel prompted the Compensation Committee to suggest replacing this group with ten out-of-work congressmen. While leaping ability may be somewhat sacrificed, the savings are significant because we expect an oversupply of unemployed congressmen this year.

Eleven pipers piping and twelve drummers drumming is a simple case of the band getting too big. A substitution with a string quartet, a cut back on new music and no uniforms will produce savings which will drop right down to the bottom line.

We can expect a substantial reduction in assorted people, fowl, animals and other expenses. Though incomplete, studies indicate that stretching deliveries over twelve days is inefficient. If we can drop ship in one day, service levels will be improved.

Regarding the lawsuit filed by the attorney's association seeking expansion to include the legal profession ('thirteen lawyers-a-suing'), action is pending.

Lastly, it is not beyond consideration that deeper cuts may be necessary in the future to stay competitive. Should that happen, the Board will request management to scrutinize the Snow White Division to see if seven dwarfs is the right number.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND...

2008-11-03T05:45:00.000-08:00

WIFE VS. HUSBAND

A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.

An earlier discussion had led to an argument and

neither of them wanted to concede their position.

As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,

the husband asked sarcastically, 'Relatives of yours?'
'Yep,' the wife replied, 'in-laws.'

W O R D S

A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a day...

30,000 to a man's 15,000.
The wife replied, 'The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men...
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, 'What?'

CREATION

A man said to his wife one day, 'I don't know how you can be

so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.
' The wife responded, 'Allow me to explain.

God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me;
God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!

WHO DOES WHAT

A man and his wife were having an argument about who
should brew the coffee each morning.
The wife said, 'You should do it, because you get up first,

and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee.'
The husband said, ' You are in charge of cooking around here and

you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my coffee.'
Wife replies, 'No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible

that the man should do the coffee.'
Husband replies, 'I can't believe that, show me.'
So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament

and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed says........ ..'HEBREWS'

The Silent Treatment

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each
other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day,
he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business flight.

Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper,
'Please wake me at 5:00 AM.' He left it where he knew she would find it.
The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM
and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, 'It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.'
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

God may have created man before woman,

but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece.

SEND THIS TO SMART WOMEN WHO NEED A LAUGH AND TO MEN YOU THINK CAN HANDLE IT !

Beware Of This Postal Scam...

2008-10-30T09:20:00.000-07:00

Can you circulate this around everyone you know especially as Christmas is fast approaching - it has been confirmed by Royal Mail. The Trading Standards Office are making people aware of the following scam:

A card is posted through your door from a company called PDS (Parcel Delivery Service)suggesting that they were unable to deliver a parcel and that you need to contact them on 0906 6611911 (a premium rate number). DO NOT call this number, as this is a mail scam originating from Belize .

If you call the number and you start to hear a recorded message you will already have been billed £15 for the phone call.

If you do receive a card with these details, then please contact Royal Mail Fraud on 02072396655 or ICSTIS (the premium rate service regulator) at http://www.phonepayplus.org.uk/

I'm One Of The 55. Are You?

2008-09-09T08:32:00.000-07:00

I'm one of the 55. Are You?

fi yuo cna raed tihs, yuo hvae a sgtrane mnid too. Cna yuo raed tihs? Olny 55 plepoe out of 100 can.

i cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdanieg. The phaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid, aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it dseno't mtaetr in waht oerdr the ltteres in a wrod are, the olny iproamtnt tihng is taht the frsit and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it whotuit a pboerlm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Azanmig huh? yaeh and I awlyas tghuhot slpeling was ipmorantt! if you can raed tihs forwrad it.
FORWARD THIS ONLY
IF YOU CAN READ IT

Spell Checker Blues.....

2008-08-25T06:54:00.000-07:00

'Spell Checker Blues'

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight four it two say
Weather eye am wrong oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long
And eye can put the error rite
Its rarely ever wrong.

Eye have run this poem threw it
I am shore your pleased two no
Its letter perfect in it's weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

Anon

You Will Love This One!

2008-07-14T08:26:00.000-07:00

Three Men on a Hike

Three men were hiking through a forest when they came upon a large raging, violent river. Needing to get to the other side, the first man prayed: 'God, please give me the strength to cross the river.'

Poof! . God gave him big arms and strong legs and he was able to swimacross in about 2 hours, having almost drowned twice.

After witnessing that, the second man prayed: 'God, please give me strength and the tools to cross the river'

Poof! ..... God gave him a rowboat and strong arms and strong legs and he was able to row across in about an hour after almost capsizing once.

Seeing what happened to the first two men, the third man prayed: 'God, please give me the strength, the tools and the intelligence to cross the river'

Poof! ... He was turned in to a woman. She checked the map, hiked one hundred yards up stream and walked across the bridge.

FW: RESIMAY - JOB APPLICATION [SEC=UNCLASSIFIED]

2008-06-18T06:26:00.000-07:00

Think you will like this.....

R esimay

To hoom it mae cunsern,

I waunt to apply for the job what I saw in the paper.

I can Type realee quik wit one finggar and do sum a counting..

I think I am good on the phone and I no I am a pepole person,
Pepole really seam to respond to me well. Certain men and all the ladies.

I no my spelling is not to good but find that I Offen can get a job thru my persinalety.

My salerery is open so we can discus wat you want to pay me and wat you think that I am werth,

I can s tart emeditely. Thank you in advanse fore yore anser.

hopifuly Yore best aplicant so farr.

Sinseerly,

BRYAN

PS : Because my resimay is a bit short - below is a p ickture of me.

Employer's response:

Dear Bryan,

It's OK honey, we've got spell check.
See you Monday.

Hammeruler- It's New!

2008-06-12T08:35:00.000-07:00

Gas Station Convenience......

2008-06-11T07:11:00.000-07:00

Runaway Horses By Belinda Carlisle- A Great Song

2008-05-10T03:31:00.000-07:00

Extra Cash.....

2008-05-06T10:29:00.000-07:00

Get Me There.....

2008-05-01T08:20:00.000-07:00

Breakup And Learn

2008-04-23T01:33:00.000-07:00

What about dNeero?

2008-04-16T02:02:00.001-07:00

All earnings for this survey go straight to Charity;

The Stranger

2008-04-09T07:38:00.000-07:00

The Stranger

A few years after I was born, my dad met a stranger who was new to our small town. From the beginning, Dad was fascinated with this enchanting newcomer and soon invited him to live with our family. The stranger was quickly accepted and was around from then on.

As I grew up, I never questioned his place in my family. In my young mind, he had a special niche. My parents were complementary instructors: Mum taught me good from evil, and Dad taught me to obey But the stranger... he was our storyteller. He would keep us spellbound for hours on end with adventures, mysteries, and comedies. If I wanted to know anything about politics, history or science, he always knew the answers about the past, understood the present and even seemed able to predict the future!

He took my family to the first major league ball game. He made me laugh, and he made me cry. The stranger never stopped talking, but Dad didn't seem to mind.
Sometimes, Mum would get up quietly while the rest of us were shushing each other to listen to what he had to say, and she would go to the kitchen for peace and quiet. (I wonder now if she ever prayed for the stranger to leave.)

Dad ruled our household with certain moral convictions, but the stranger never felt obligated to honour them. Profanity, for example, was not allowed in our home... not from us, our friends or any visitors. Our longtime visitor, however, got away with four-letter words that burned my ears and made my dad squirm and my mother blush.

My dad didn't permit the liberal use of alcohol. But the stranger encouraged us to try it on a regular basis. He made cigarettes look cool, cigars manly, and pipes distinguished. He talked freely (much too freely) about sex. His comments were sometimes blatant, sometimes suggestive, and generally embarrassing.

I now know that my early concepts about relationships were influenced strongly by the stranger. Time after time, he opposed the values of my parents, yet he was seldom rebuked... And NEVER asked to leave.

More than fifty years have passed since the stranger moved in with our family. He has blended right in and is not nearly as fascinating as he was at first. If you could walk into my parents' den today, you would still find him sitting over in his corner, waiting for someone to listen to him talk and watch him draw his pictures.

His name??

We just call him 'Tellie'.

He has a wife now...We call her 'Computer'!

Catch The Latest News....

2008-03-26T05:28:00.001-07:00

Gas Prices On The Rise....

2008-03-24T10:11:00.000-07:00

When It Comes to Wine Who Are You?

2008-03-19T08:48:00.000-07:00

Hamburgers and French Fries....

2008-03-15T04:06:00.000-07:00

Salmon A La Dishwasher

2008-03-13T09:31:00.000-07:00

Exercise Routine.....

2008-03-12T06:47:00.000-07:00

You might want to take it easy at first, then do it faster as you become
more proficient. It may be too strenuous for some.

Always consult your doctor before starting any exercise program!

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That's enough for the first day. Great job.

Have a Chocolate.

Typing The Wrong E-Mail Address......

2008-03-10T04:37:00.000-07:00

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter.

They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years before.

Because of their hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel
schedules.

So, the husband left Minneapolis and flew to Florida on Friday, and his wife was flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel, and unlike years ago, there was a computer
in his room, and he decided to send an email to his wife.

However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address, and without
noticing his error, sent the email to the wrong address.

Meanwhile....somewhere in Houston ...a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral.

He was a Minister who was called home to glory after suffering a heart attack.

The widow decided to check her email, expecting messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she screamed and then fainted.

The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and then glanced up and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Date: Friday, October 13, 2004
Subject: I have Arrived!

Dearest Love:

I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now, and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I have just arrived and have been checked in.

I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow, and look forward to seeing you then.

Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

PS ....... Sure is hot down here!!

Pics - Capture The Moment And The Soul....

2008-03-09T10:16:00.000-07:00

Use Real Salt....

2008-03-06T03:49:00.000-08:00

Use Real Salt

‘Your table salt is actually 97.5% sodium chloride and 2.5% chemicals such as moisture absorbents and iodine. Dried at over 1,200 degrees Fahrenheit, the excessive heat alters the natural chemical structure of the salt causing the potential for a myriad of health problems in your body.’ – Dr Joseph Mercola

Common table salt is a poison, refined from Nature’s storehouse to remove all elements but sodium chloride. Some say we ended up with this particular compound due to industry’s colossal use of it. Whatever the reason, table salt is not real ‘salt’ and its dangers are well touted:

· It destabilises blood pressure

· Can cause cellulite, kidney stones and rheumatism

· Upsets your fluid balance

· Acts as a diuretic (expels water from cells)

· Thereby a cell-toxin

· Contains the endocrine disrupters, fluoride and iodine

· Contains fillers such as calcium carbonate and aluminium hydroxide, the latter aluminium implicated in Alzheimer’s Disease

Some PR job to convince the world we need it, eh?

Yet ‘salt’ is essential for the body’s systems. Farmers know if they don’t put out the salt blocks for their cattle, they die. This is real salt as Nature intended, not the truncated, worse-than-useless mess made of it in the refining process.

Enter saltpan salt, sea salt, Celtic salt, and the pink Dalek of all salts, Himalayan crystallized salt, or ‘white gold‘ as it’s come to be known (light pink gold, actually). Dr Mercola declares this mother-of-all-salts:

· Regulates the water content throughout your body

· Balances excess acidity from your cells, particularly your brain cells

· Balances your blood sugar levels and helps reduce your aging rate

· Assists in the generation of hydroelectric energy in cells in your body and absorption of food particles through your intestinal tract

· Helps clear mucus plugs and phlegm from your lungs - particularly useful in asthma and cystic fibrosis

· Acts as a strong natural antihistamine to help clear up congestion in your sinuses

· Prevents muscle cramps

· Makes the structure of your bones firm - osteoporosis can occur when your body needs more salt and takes it from your bones

· Regulates your sleep - it is a natural hypnotic

· Maintains your libido

· Prevents varicose veins and spider veins on your legs and thighs

· Stabilizes irregular heartbeats - in conjunction with water, [salt] is actually essential for the regulation of your blood pressure

These claims are backed by evidence. Barbara Hendel MD and Peter Ferreira cover most of it in Water and Salt, The Essence of Life (available through Amazon). World renowned water doctor, Fereydoon Batmanghelidj MD’s Water and Salt, Your Healers From Within, available through Credence, contains much of the Iranian physician’s decades of studies into the building blocks of life. The manufacturers of FIJI water, as another example, remark on their web-site:

‘A nine-week, double-blind university study undertaken in 2003 at the Inter-University of Graz, Austria, examined the effects of drinking a minimum of 1.5 liters of tap water per day with common table salt vs. a minimum of 1.5 liters of FIJI Water with Original Himalayan Crystal Salt on physical and psychological functions of the body. In the study, patients who drank FIJI Water together with the Original Himalayan Crystal Salt saw significant positive changes in respiratory, circulatory, organ, connective tissue and nervous system functions. Patients also reported increases in the quality of sleep, energy and concentration levels, brain activity, weight loss, enhanced consciousness and noticeable nail and hair growth.’ [1]

The medical orthodoxy is not kind to any notion of water cures and a super-salt, crying ‘commercialism’ and ‘quackery’, indubitably the pot calling the kettle black. My advice? Switch to Himalayan salt or at least a whole salt. Table salt is just that – sodium chloride. Himalayan salt is sodium chloride plus 82 other minerals in its natural, crystalline form, all ready to feed metabolic processes the way Nature intended. Drink two litres of uncontaminated water a day. There are other advantages.

Get Sole and Slap it All Over

Topical applications and baths in whole-salt solutions have been found to help with psoriasis, eczema, toe-nail fungus, insect bites, rheumatism and arthritis, acne, ear infections, nasal congestion and sore throats (these are also all dehydration issues). The solution used is known as sole, (pronounced so-lay). Take a container of water and start mixing Himalayan salt crystals into it, stirring well, until the salt no longer dissolves. The solution is now 26% saturated and sterile, so can be re-used. Sole in a hot water bowl can be inhaled as a decongestant for blocked sinuses since it is antiseptic and ideal for bacterial/fungal/yeast conditions.

Pizza-- It's A Food Group!

2008-03-02T08:29:00.000-08:00

Want To Link Your Blog With Mine?

2008-02-29T03:31:00.000-08:00

If you would like to have your Blog listed on mine in the sidebar (under Sites Linking To Us) just add my Blog to your Blog (again in the sidebar under heading Sites Linking To Us. It has to be hyperlinked so your visitors can just press on it if they want to get to mine rather than having to copy and paste into a new window in the browser. Then just comment here leaving you Blog address where you have placed my link on and once I have checked it I will add it to mine.
As long as it is on yours it will remain on mine and vice versa.
Only clean,safe family viewable Blogs please as this is being heavily promoted everywhere.

Leak Fixed! Other Blog Not Viewable!

2008-02-28T03:57:00.000-08:00

Well we kicked up a fuss and got someone out within two hours to check on our leak etc.
Finally the drip has now stopped!
The plumber was able to get in the above flat yesterday to see that it was the neighbours tank overflowing everytime they flushed it. They are going to get a new system fitted and we are going to get a new light fitting and the damp treated with anti mould paint.
That will be next week now as everything has to be allowed to dry completely.
That is one problem sorted.
Then I discover the other day my other Blog has only been made viewable to other Blog authors.
Some message in my dashbord about Violating Terms (though it has not and there is nothing on there to offend anyone)
Seems under the Blogger help group there have been others around the same time had their Blogs deleted or restricted for no reason at all.
So something weird is going on.
Anyway I am in the process of having my own domain so that I can get it showing up on that. Just have to redirect and change the DNS settings and then that will be me setup. Beauty of this is there will be no blogger band at the top with their flag and next button so close to each other someone can mistakenly flag your Blog without meaning to and more than once it will get suspended/restricted until the Blogger Team have checked and ok it which can take up to 5 weeks!

Ok, another week approaching.....

2008-02-24T08:40:00.000-08:00

Well this last few days have been busy. I had a friend up to visit so I have been out seeing her.
Then our leak in the Living Room has got worse!
Now we have a bucket under it.
No one will come and fix it until the 11th Mar either!
The repair line we phoned are useless. It is done through the Council but now they have
farmed their repair work to this Private Company no one wants to do anything. They spend the money the get on brand new vans but are trying to do as little repairs as possible. The less they have to physically do the more money from the yearly budget they get to keep for themselves.
Well just have to push to get it sorted asap. There is no way we should have to wait over two weeks to get a leak fixed.
The drip,drip every 10secs would get on anyone's nerves!
Not a good start to another week.

LetsTalk About Cars......

2008-02-21T07:50:00.000-08:00

Your Dreams......

2008-02-14T04:21:00.000-08:00

Joke Of The Day!

2008-01-31T08:24:00.000-08:00

How to Tell the Sex of a Fly........

JUST TOO CUTE.
This is the cleanest joke I've come across in a long while!

A woman walked into the kitchen to find her husband stalking around with a fly swatter.

'What are you doing?' she asked.

'Hunting Flies' he responded.

'Oh! Killing any?' she asked.

'Yep, 3 males, 2 Females,' he replied.

Intrigued, she asked,
'How can you tell them apart?'

He responded,
'3 were on a beer can, 2 were on the phone.'

Hope this makes you smile on a miserable day!

2008-01-20T12:18:00.000-08:00

Louvre Robbery aka French lessons.......

A thief in Paris planned to steal some paintings from the Louvre.

After careful planning, he got past security, stole the paintings and made it safely to his van.

However, he was captured only two blocks away when his van ran out of gas.

When asked how he could mastermind such a crime and then make such an obvious error, he replied,

"Monsieur that is the reason I stole the paintings.

I had no Monet

to buy Degas

to make the Van Gogh"

See if you have De Gaulle to send this on to someone else.

I sent it to you because I figured I had nothing Toulouse.

THE YEAR 1907??

2007-12-17T08:59:00.000-08:00

This will boggle your mind, I know it did mine!
The year is 1907.
One hundred years ago.
What a difference a century makes!
Here are some statistics for the Year 1907 :
************************************
The average life expectancy was 47 years
Only 14 percent of the homes had a bathtub.
Only 8 percent of the homes had a telephone.
The maximum speed limit in most cities was 10 mph.
The tallest structure in the world was the Eiffel Tower !
The average wage in 1907 was 22 cents per hour.
The average worker made between $200 and $400 per year .
A competent accountant could expect to earn $2000 per year,
A dentist $2,500 per year, a veterinarian between $1,500 and $4,000 per year, and a mechanical engineer about $5,000 per year.
More than 95 percent of all births took place at HOME .
Ninety percent of all doctors had NO COLLEGE EDUCATION!
Instead, they attended so-called medical schools, many of which
Were condemned in the press AND the government as 'substandard.'
Sugar cost four cents a pound.
Eggs were fourteen cents a dozen.
Coffee was fifteen cents a pound.
Most women only washed their hair once a month, and used
Borax or egg yolks for shampoo.
Five leading causes of death were:
1. Pneumonia and influenza
2. Tuberculosis
3. Diarrhea
4. Heart disease
5. Stroke

Crossword puzzles, canned beer, and ice tea Hadn't been invented yet.
There was no Mother's Day or Father's Day.
Two out of every 10 adults couldn't read or write.
Marijuana, heroin, and morphine were all available over the counter at the local chemist.
Back then pharmacists said,
'Heroin clears the complexion, gives buoyancy to the mind, regulates the stomach and bowels, and is, in fact, a perfect guardian of health.'
Now I forwarded this from someone else without typing
It myself, and sent it to you and others all over
Possibly the entire world, in a matter of seconds!
Try to imagine what it may be like in another 100 years.

Santa's Puzzle Seasonal Fun...

2007-12-12T06:09:00.000-08:00

I got sent this the other day and had to share it will all my Blog readers.
It is worth it. The end result made me smile.
I am sure it will make your day too!
Click the link and complete the puzzle today. Once completed wait for the seasonal greetings at the end.
http://www.jacquielawson.com/viewcard.asp?code=ER13610552

Found On The Internet......

2007-12-09T08:46:00.000-08:00

Be Appreciative.....

2007-12-07T02:39:00.000-08:00

TO A "KEEPER"!

One day a mother died.

And on that clear, cold morning,

in the warmth of her bedroom,

the daughter was struck with

the pain of learning that sometimes

there isn't any more.

No more hugs,

no more lucky moments to celebrate together,

no more phone calls just to chat,

No more "just one minute."

Sometimes, what we care about the most goes away.

never to return before we can say good-bye,

or say "I Love You."

So while we have it . . it's best we love it . .

And care for it and fix it when it's broken

and take good care of it when it's sick.

This is true for marriage and friendships,

And children with bad report cards;

And dogs with bad hips;

And aging parents and grandparents .

We keep them because they are worth it,

Because we cherish them!

Sure, sometimes they irritate us...

Life would be boring!

Some things we keep --

like a best friend who moved away

or a classmate we grew up with.

There are just some things that

make us happy no matter what.

Life is important,

and so are the people we know .

And so, we keep them close!

I received this from someone

who thought I was a 'KEEPER'!

And I send it to those whom I want to keep close.

Christmas is more than shopping and giving. Do You Agree?

2007-12-06T08:08:00.000-08:00

Not long Before Christmas......

2007-12-05T03:46:00.000-08:00

The weeks and days are flying by as usual. The shops are full of all those Christmas decorations and lots of gift ideas. The streets are packed with shoppers getting all their shopping done.
What I love at this time of year is being with family. Spending time with each other and appreciating the people we have around us is important.
I have not seen my parents for three months and my brothers I have not seen for eight months so am looking forward to us all being able to be together this year.

Scams How To Avoid Them?

2007-11-19T02:34:00.000-08:00

There are so many new money makers starting up all claiming you can earn 1000's a month but do they really do what they claim?
I think not. I try and make sure I do not get conned and if I think something is good and I can join for free I will.
Paying money out ahead of time is risk after all nothing can really 'guarantee' you will make the money that is advertised.
After all what makes someone else money and is successful for them may not be for someone else.
So it is up to each individual to make decisions on whether they give a program a try or not.
You have to be more careful if it is going to cost you money to join in the first place. If you are buying something that is going to be useful for you to use either for business/personal use then it won't matter if you don't make a profit on it.
I have lost money but am also making money online. So some things have worked out alright for me where other things haven't.
A risk is ok and is good sometimes as long as the result won't be detrimental to your finances.
Only risk what you can afford to lose. Don't spend what you can't afford to pay back if you use a Credit Card to pay for something.

Your Opinion The Job What Is it All About?

2007-11-17T07:46:00.001-08:00

Good Maths Joke....

2007-11-16T04:42:00.000-08:00

YOUR AGE BY EATING OUT

Don't tell me your age; you probably would tell a falsehood anyway-but your waiter may know!

YOUR AGE BY DINER & RESTAURANT MATH
This is pretty neat.

DON'T CHEAT BY SCROLLING DOWN FIRST!

It takes less than a minute .
Work this out as you read .
Be sure you don't read the bottom until you've worked it out!
This is not one of those waste of time things, it's fun.

1. First of all, pick the number of times a week that you would like to go out to eat.
(more than once but less than 10)

2. Multiply this number by 2 (just to be bold)

3. Add 5

4. Multiply it by 50

5. If you have already had your birthday this year add 1757 .
If you haven't, add 1756.

6. Now subtract the four digit year that you were born.

You should have a three digit number

The first digit of this was your original number
(i.e., how many times you want to go out to restaurants in a week.)

The next two numbers are YOUR AGE! (Oh YES, it is!!!!!)

THIS IS THE ONLY YEAR (2007) IT WILL EVER WORK, SO SPREAD IT AROUND WHILE IT LASTS

Climb Stairs Whenever You Can

2007-11-04T03:28:00.000-08:00

Then climb ‘em again!
by Dr Phillip Day.

Stair-climbing is shunned by most, yet a more remarkable form of aerobic exercise one can not imagine without all the dread of anticipating it.

‘Goodness, stairs!’

Climb them.

Then climb them again.

You can do it in the home. You can do it at the train station. Stair-climbing increases the heart-rate, works the lungs, and is a great, overall muscle-conditioner. I seem to live in hotels so Samantha and I make a point of working the stairs at every opportunity. Stair-climbing machines are also great if you have a gym membership or the motivation to use one at home (I don’t). Problem is, you just don’t seem to go anywhere, which I find quite disheartening. When I lived in California, local residents would make use of a colossal flight of steps that ran up a Santa Monica hillside (200 steps at least). I went back there the other day. Dozens still show up from dawn onwards, young and old alike, and wheeze their way to the top. And then come down and do it all again.

Stair-climbing is one of the best exercises going, since its action is aerobic (oxygen-burning) and galvanises the metabolism. Don’t overdo. Exercise to the degree that you’re able, and consult a doctor if you have an existing condition.

‘Counting steps instead of miles can boost your walking workout and save you time,’ says www.prevention.com. ‘Researchers in England and Northern Ireland asked 12 sedentary women to climb a 200-step staircase, progressing from once a day to six times a day (they were allowed to take the elevator down.) Each ascent took about 2 minutes, so by the end of the study, the women were exercising only 12 minutes a day.

In less than 2 months, they saw a boost in their fitness level, along with improvements in their cholesterol level that were enough to cut their risk of cardiovascular disease by 33 percent.

‘This is among the best evidence that short bouts of exercise can have tremendous health benefits," says study author Colin Boreham, PhD, of the University of Ulster in Northern Ireland.’[1]

* * * * *

This bird walks into a store....

2007-10-01T08:22:00.000-07:00

This is one smart seagull…..

A seagull in Scotland has developed the habit of stealing chips from
a neighborhood shop. The seagull waits until the shopkeeper isn't looking,
and then walks into the store and grabs a snack-size bag of cheese Doritos.

Once outside, the bag gets ripped open and shared by other birds.

The seagull's shoplifting started early this month when he first
swooped into the store in Aberdeen, Scotland, and helped himself to a bag
of chips. Since then, he's become a regular.
He always takes the same type of chips.

Customers have begun paying for the seagull's stolen bags of chips
because they think it's so funny.

Check out how much faster the bird walks on his way out!
Hilarious!

Laugh A Lot!

2007-09-30T08:22:00.000-07:00

‘Teenagers, are you tired of being harassed by your stupid parents? Act now. Move out, get a job, and pay your own bills – while you still know everything.’

– John Hinde

Laughter relieves stress, makes you pull faces, and gets you taking life a little less seriously. Let’s face it, laughing’s pretty funny, though too much of it and they’ll think there’s something wrong with you (look Jim Carrey).

The Washington Post reports: ‘A hearty laugh a day may keep the doctor away, say the findings of a unique study. Whereas previous studies have examined how negative emotions can adversely affect our health, this study took a new spin - they measured the affect of watching a funny movie on the ability of heart blood vessels to expand. And they found some surprising results - laughing increased blood flow as much as a 15- to 30-minute workout.

The ability of blood vessels to expand is known as vasodilation. Poor vasodilation means that passageways may be blocked and blood flow may be cut off. The result is an increased risk of heart attacks and strokes. In the study, 20 healthy men and women watched clips of two movies - a violent battle scene from "Saving Private Ryan" or a humorous scene from a comedy such as "Kingpin." Each participant's vasodilation was measured prior to the movie and again afterward.

The results were "dramatic." Of the 20 participants who saw the stressful film, 14 had significantly reduced blood flow. However, after watching the funny film, 19 of the 20 volunteers had significantly increased blood flow. Specifically:

Blood flow decreased by about 35 percent after experiencing stress

Blood flow increased by 22 percent after laughing, which is equivalent to what happens after a 15- to 30-minute workout.[6]

Paul J Rosch MD, president of the American Institute of Stress, agrees: ‘In one study of 2,500 senior citizens who were followed for six years, those who scored high on a happiness quiz had much fewer strokes than those at the bottom of the scale. In another study of more than 200 middle-aged healthy London civil service employees, those who reported feeling happy almost every day, whether while at work or on weekends, were significantly healthier and had lower heart rates than others who were not as consistently jolly and gleeful.

After adjusting for age, smoking, weight and other possible influences, it was found that people in the top fifth for daily happiness scores had cortisol levels 32 percent lower than those in the bottom quintile. Happiness was also linked to a lower average heart rate in men. While the majority showed some rise in fibrinogen following the mental stress test, this was far greater for the least happy group compared to those at the other end of the scale.

…benefits of laughing reported by this and other groups here and abroad include:

Relaxation and reduction in muscle tension

·Lowered production of stress hormones

·Improved immune system function

·Reduction in blood pressure

·Clearing the lungs by dislodging mucous plugs

Increasing the production of salivary immunoglobulin A, which defends against infectious organisms that enter through the respiratory tract

·Aerobic effects that increased the body's ability to utilize oxygen

·A rapid ability to disregard aches and pains or to perceive them as less severe [7]

So get chortling.

The Dash Poem

2007-09-28T04:46:00.000-07:00

This is one worth watching.
It is very inspiring;
http://www.thedashmovie.com/

Banana Facts..

2007-09-26T06:41:00.000-07:00

Never, put your banana in the refrigerator!!!
This is interesting.
After reading this, you'll never look at a banana in the same way again.

Bananas contain three natural sugars - sucrose, fructose and glucose combined with fiber. A banana gives an instant, sustained and substantial boost of energy.

Research has proven that just two bananas provide enough energy for a strenuous 90-minute workout. No wonder the banana is the number one fruit with the world's leading athletes.

But energy isn't the only way a banana can help us keep fit.

It can also help overcome or prevent a substantial number of illnesses and conditions, making it a must to add to our daily diet.

Depression: According to a recent survey undertaken by MIND amongst people suffering from depression, many felt much better after eating a banana. This is because bananas contain tryptophan, a type of protein that the body converts into serotonin, known to make you relax, improve your mood and generally make you feel happier.

PMS: Forget the pills - eat a banana. The vitamin B6 it contains regulates blood glucose levels, which can affect your mood.

Anemia: High in iron, bananas can stimulate the production of hemoglobin in the blood and so helps in cases of anemia.

Blood Pressure: This unique tropical fruit is extremely high in potassium yet low in salt, making it perfect to beat blood pressure. So much so, the US Food and Drug Administration has just allowed the banana industry to make official claims for the fruit's ability to reduce the risk of blood pressure and stroke.

Brain Power: 200 students at a Twickenham (Middlesex) school were helped through their exams this year by eating bananas at breakfast, break, and lunch in a bid to boost their brain power. Research has shown that the potassium-packed fruit can assist learning by making pupils more alert.

Constipation: High in fiber, including bananas in the diet can help restore normal bowel action, helping to overcome the problem without resorting to laxatives.

Hangovers: One of the quickest
ways of curing a hangover is to make a banana milkshake, sweetened with honey. The banana calms the stomach and, with the help of the honey, builds up depleted blood sugar levels, while the milk soothes and re-hydrates your system.

Heartburn: Bananas have a natural antacid effect in the body, so if you suffer from heartburn, try eating a banana for soothing relief.

Morning Sickness: Snacking on bananas between meals helps to keep blood sugar levels up and avoid morning sickness.

Mosquito bites: Before reaching for the insect bite cream, try rubbing the affected area with the inside of a banana skin. Many people find it amazingly successful at reducing swelling and irritation.

Nerves: Bananas are high in B vitamins that help calm the nervous system.

Overweight and at work? Studies at the Institute of Psychology in Austria found pressure at work leads to gorging on comfort food like chocolate and crisps. Looking at 5,000 hospital patients, researchers found the most obese were more likely to be in high-pressure jobs. The report concluded that, to avoid panic-induced food cravings, we need to control our blood sugar levels by snacking on high carbohydrate foods every two hours to keep levels steady.

Ulcers: The banana is used as the dietary food against intestinal disorders because of its soft texture and smoothness. It is the only raw fruit that can be eaten without distress in over-chronicler cases. It also neutralizes over-acidity and reduces irritation by coating the lining of the stomach.

Temperature control: Many other cultures see bananas as a "cooling" fruit that can lower both the physical and emotional temperature of expectant mothers. In Thailand, for example, pregnant women eat bananas to ensure their baby is born with a cool temperature.

Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD): Bananas can help SAD sufferers because they contain the natural mood enhancer tryptophan.

Smoking & Tobacco Use: Bananas can also help people trying to give up smoking. The B6, B12 they contain, as well as the potassiu! m and ma gnesium found in them, help the body recover from the effects of nicotine withdrawal.

Stress: Potassium is a vital mineral, which helps normalize the heartbeat, sends oxygen to the brain and regulates your body's water balance. When we are stressed, our metabolic rate rises, thereby reducing our potassium levels. These can be rebalanced with the help of a high-potassium banana snack.

Strokes: According to research in "The New England Journal of Medicine, 'eating bananas as part of a regular diet can cut the risk of death by strokes by as much as 40%!

Warts: Those keen on natural alternatives swear that if you want to kill off a wart, take a piece of banana skin and place it on the wart, with the yellow side out. Carefully hold the skin in place with a plaster or surgical tape!

So, a banana really is a natural remedy for many ills. When you compare it to an apple, it has four times the protein, twice the carbohydrate, three times the phosphorus, five times the vitamin A and iron, and twice the other vitamins and minerals. It is also rich in potassium and is one of the best value foods around So maybe its time to change that well-known phrase so that we say, "A banana a day keeps the doctor away!"
PASS IT ON TO YOUR FRIENDS
PS: Bananas must be the reason monkeys are so happy all the time! I will add one here; want a quick shine on our shoes?? Take the INSIDE of the banana skin, and rub directly on the shoe...polish with dry cloth. Amazing fruit.

Fun Stuff......

2007-09-21T05:08:00.000-07:00

The liquid inside young coconuts can be used as a substitute for

Blood plasma.
***************************************************************************
No piece of paper can be folded in half

more than seven (7) times. Try it!

****************************************************************************
Donkeys kill more people annually

than plane crashes.
************************************************************************
You burn more calories sleeping

than you do watching television.
**************************************************************************
Oak trees do not produce acorns
until they are fifty (50) years of age or older.
****************************************************************************
The first product to have a bar code

was Wrigley's gum.
*************************************************************************
The King of Hearts is the only king

WITHOUT A MOUSTACHE
***************************************************************************
American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987
by eliminating one (1) olive

from each salad served in first-class.
**************************************************************************
Venus is the only planet that rotates clockwise.

*********************************************************************
Apples, not caffeine,

are more efficient at waking you up in the morning.
***********************************************************************
Most dust particles in your house are made from

DEAD SKIN!
****************************************************************************
The first owner of the Marlboro Company died of lung cancer.

So did the first "Marlboro Man."
***************************************************************************
Walt Disney was afraid

OF MICE!
**************************************************************************
PEARLS MELT

IN VINEGAR!
*********************************************************************
The three most valuable brand names on earth:
Marlboro, Coca Cola, and Budweiser, in that order.
**********************************************************************
It is possible to lead a cow upstairs...

but, not downstairs.
************************************************************************
A duck's quack doesn't echo,

and no one knows why.
************************************************************************
Dentists have recommended that a toothbrush
be kept at least six (6) feet away from
a toilet to avoid airborne particles
resulting from the flush.

(I keep my toothbrush in the living room now!)
***************************************************
Richard Millhouse Nixon

was the first U.S. president whose name contains all
the letters from the word "criminal."

The second?
William Jefferson Clinton

*********************************************************

And the best for last.....

Turtles can breathe through their butts.
********************************************

Stress Management

2007-09-20T03:10:00.000-07:00

A lecturer, when explaining stress management to an audience, raised a glass of water and asked, "How heavy is this glass of water?"
Answers called out ranged from 20g to 500g.
The lecturer replied, "The absolute weight doesn't matter."
It depends on how long you try to hold it.
"If I hold it for a minute, that's not a problem.
If I hold it for an hour, I'll have an ache in my right arm.
If I hold it for a day, you'll have to call an ambulance.
"In each case, it's the same weight, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it becomes."
He continued, "And that's the way it is with stress management.
If we carry our burdens all the time, sooner or later, as the burden becomes increasingly heavy, we won't be able to carry on."
"As with the glass of water, you have to put it down for a while and rest before holding it again.
When we're refreshed, we can carry on with the burden."

"So, before you return home tonight, put the burden of work down.

Don't carry it home.

You can pick it up tomorrow.
Whatever burdens you're carrying now, let them down for a moment if you can."

"Relax; pick them up later after you've rested.

Life is short. Enjoy it!

And then he shared some ways of dealing with the burdens of life:

* Accept that some days you're the pigeon, and some days you're the statue.

* Always keep your words soft and sweet, just in case you have to eat them.

* Always read stuff that will make you look good if you die in the middle of it.

* Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be recalled by their maker.

* If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague.

* If you lend someone $20 and never see them again, it was probably worth it.

* It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others.

* Never buy a car you can't push.

* Never put both feet in your mouth at the same time, because then you won't have a leg to stand on.

* Nobody cares if you can't dance well. Just get up and dance.

* Since it's the early worm that gets eaten by the bird, sleep late.

* The second mouse gets the cheese.

* When everything's coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.

* Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.

* You may be only one person in the world, but you may also be the world to one person.

* Some mistakes are too much fun to only make once.

* We could learn a lot from crayons. Some are sharp, some are pretty and some are dull.Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box.

A truly happy person is one who can enjoy the scenery on a detour.

Have an awesome day and know that someone has thought about you today. . . . .. ..... I did.

--

Short Story...

2007-09-17T03:03:00.000-07:00

Anne was a harpist and her friend Sam was a trombonist. One night after rehearsal, the two went to a disco. Since Sam’s car wouldn’t lock, the two took their instruments to the disco with them. The club’s owner was one of Sam’s good friends, so he allowed them to lock their instruments in his office. By the end of the night, they had had too much to drink. They forgot their instruments. The next night at rehearsal, the conductor asked Anne where her harp was. Anne replied, “I left my harp in Sam’s friend’s disco.”

He! He!

What Comes Around, Goes Around....

2007-09-14T04:35:00.000-07:00

He almost didn't see the old lady, stranded on the side of the road,
but even in the dim light of day, he could see she needed help. So he
pulled up in front of her Mercedes and got out. His Pontiac was still
sputtering when he approached her.
Even with the smile on his face, she was worried. No one had stopped
to help for the last hour or so . Was he going to hurt her? He didn't
look safe; he looked poor and hungry.

He could see that she was frightened, standing out there in the cold.
He knew how she felt. It was that chill which only fears can put in you.
He said, "I'm here to help you, ma'am. Why don't you wait in the car
where it's warm? By the way, my name is Bryan Anderson."
Well, all she had was a flat tire, but for an old lady, that was bad
enough. Bryan crawled under the car looking for a place to put the jack,
skinning his knuckles a time or two. Soon he was able to change the
tire. But he had to get dirty and his hands hurt.
As he was tightening up the lug nuts, she rolled down the window and
began to talk to him. She told him that she was from St. Louis and was
only just passing through. She couldn't thank him enough for coming to
her aid.
Bryan just smiled as he closed her trunk. The lady asked how much she
owed him. Any amount would have been all right with her. She already
imagined all the awful things that could have happened had he not
stopped. Bryan never thought twice about being paid. This was not a job
to him. This was helping someone in need, and God knows there were
plenty who had given him a hand in the past. He had lived his whole life
that way, and it never occurred to him to act any other way.
He told her that if she really wanted to pay him back, the next time
she saw someone who needed help, she could give that person the
assistance they needed, and Bryan added, "And think of me."
He waited until she started her car and drove off. It had been a cold
and depressing day, but he felt good as he headed for home, disappearing
into the twilight.
A few miles down the road the lady saw a small cafe. She went in to
grab a bite to eat, and take the chill off before she made the last leg
of her trip home. It was a dingy looking restaurant. Outside were two
old gas pumps. The whole scene was unfamiliar to her. The waitress came
over and brought a clean towel to wipe her wet hair. She had a sweet
smile, one that even being on her feet for the whole day couldn’t erase.
The lady noticed the waitress was nearly eight months pregnant, but she
never let the strain and aches change her attitude. The old lady
wondered how someone who had so little could be so giving to a stranger.
Then she remembered Bryan .
After the lady finished her meal, she paid with a hundred dollar bill.
The waitress quickly went to get change for her hundred dollar bill, but
the old lady had slipped right out the door. She was gone by the time
the waitress came back. The waitress wondered where the lady could be.
Then she noticed something written on the napkin. There were tears in
her eyes when she read what the lady wrote: "You don't owe me anything.
I have been there too. Somebody once helped me out, the way I’m helping
you. If you really want to pay me back, here is what you do: Do not let
this chain of love end with you." Under the napkin were four more $100 bills.
Well, there were tables to clear, sugar bowls to fill, and people to
serve, but the waitress made it through another day. That night when she
got home from work and climbed into bed, she was thinking about the
money and what the lady had written. How could the lady have known how
much she and her husband needed it? With the baby due next month, it was
going to be hard..
She knew how worried her husband was, and as he lay sleeping next to
her, she gave him a soft kiss and whispered soft and low, "Everything's
going to be all right. I love you, Bryan Anderson."
There is an old saying "What goes around comes around." Today, I sent
you this story, and I'm asking you to pass it on .. Let this light
shine.

"Genius is one percent inspiration and 99 percent perspiration."

- Thomas Edison

Having A Bad Day?

2007-09-12T04:30:00.000-07:00

Having a Bad Day????

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 a.m., regardless of their medical condition.

This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had something to do with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 a.m. on; Sunday, so a worldwide team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents.

The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 a.m., all of the doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the evil spirits.

Just when the clock struck 11:00, Pookie Johnson, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged the life support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

____________________________________________
Having a Bad Day????

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000.00. At a special ceremony, two of the most expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid cheers and applause from onlookers.

A minute later, in full view, a killer whale ate them both.

________________________________________________

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood, breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily listening to his Walkman.

___________________________________________________

STILL think you're having Bad Day????
Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding madly.

The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

______________________________________________

What?? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a letter bomb.

It came back with "Return to Sender" stamped on it. Forgetting it was the bomb,

he opened it and was blown to bits.

There now, feeling better????

Drink Two Litres of Water a Day....

2007-09-11T08:46:00.000-07:00

The human body is a bio-electrical machine that requires a quart of water a day for every 50 lbs of body-weight.[1] The blood alone is made up of a large percentage of watery serum. The lymph fluids, which transport waste and nutrients comprising four times the volume of blood in the body, are made from the water we consume. Every cell that makes us who we are literally owes its life to an adequate supply of fresh, clean water. When the body does not receive a reliable supply of water, it has to ration what is available and cut back on certain functions to make it go around. Essential systems like the brain are prioritised while others are cut back until the brain has decided a reliable source of water has been garnered.

Here’s the rub. Most citizens have become chronically and dangerously dehydrated (especially the young and elderly), since we decided water was too bland to drink in favour of tea, coffee, beer, wine, addictive sodas, flavoured water and other chemical-laced alternatives. A disastrous and dangerous move for society’s health, to be sure - further compounded by the fact that most doctors today cannot readily identify the many water-deficient diseases and associated pains. Thus the underlying dehydration process continues while drugs are prescribed to switch off the warning signals (symptoms).

World-renowned water expert Dr Fereydoon Batmanghelidj maintains that many common conditions are the body’s cries for water, complaints dramatically improved when a consistent, long-term intake of fresh water is introduced. Dr Batman’s best-selling book, Water and Salt, Your Healers From Within, has helped thousands quash long-term health problems effortlessly and inexpensively.[2] He writes:

‘The report of my having successfully treated with water more than three thousand people with symptoms and clinical signs of peptic ulcer disease was published in the Journal of Clinical Gastroenterology in June 1983. I came away from that experience with the understanding that the people I treated were thirsty, and I uncovered the phenomenon that ‘pain’ in the body indicates thirst, even though the condition is classified as a disease.’ [3]

Water is used by the body for digestion, detoxifying cells, watering the lungs, lubricating joints, keeping the body alkalised and a host of cleaning duties. Many symptoms arise out of the body’s inability to neutralise or rid itself of acid, a common enough complaint given the number of antacids sold around the world each day. And the dangerous misconception that fuels it?

‘I drink coffee, tea, diet sodas, beer and a host of other liquids. They contain water, don’t they?’

Many of today’s designer drinks are diuretic in their effect (water-expelling) because their mostly acidic compositions require the body to give up water in order to eliminate their harmful residues. Sodas especially are to be avoided since they require large amounts of body-water to neutralise the phosphoric acid component (2.8 pH) and carbon dioxide (the fizz, which is acidic). Cells that started off healthy and ‘plum-like’ shrivel to prunes as water, the stuff of life, is progressively denied them. The sick in our hospitals are fed the sodas, tea and coffee they ask for in woeful ignorance of the damage wrought to their micro cell-world within.

Summary

You can go without food for a month, but seven days without water and you’re all done. Your body cries out for it, your blood is made up of it, nerves, heart, lungs, bowels and brain don’t function without it, yet we answer the body’s thirst signals with tea, coffee, Fanta, Diet Coke, Red Bull and drugs. Hardly any wonder most western nations have a pub/bar culture to deal with the ravening thirst of their citizens.

Many illnesses respond well to adequate hydration. Mental performance is enhanced. Limbs operate. Blood thinned. Pain banished. Bowels happy. Skin lustrous and clear. Toxins flushed away. Water, the stuff for life. Are you getting enough?

Drink two litres of water a day

Avoid fluoridated water![4]

·Don’t drink tap water unless filtered by reverse osmosis or better [5]

·Bottled water is OK, if a little old and expensive

Avoid water served in soft plastic bottles, as these impart oestrus activity

Eat high-water-content fruits and veggies

How Smart Is Your Right Foot?

2007-09-09T06:49:00.001-07:00

This is so funny that it will boggle your mind. And, you will keep trying

it at least 50 more times to see if you can outsmart your foot. But you

can't!!!

1. While sitting at your desk, lift your right foot off the floor and make

clockwise circles with it.

2. Now, while doing this, draw the number "6" in the air with your right

hand ... Your foot will change direction!!!

I told you so ... And there is nothing you can do about it. Make sure you

pass this on to your friends ... They won't be able to believe it either!!!

Author Unknown

Interesting Blogs

2007-09-06T06:04:00.000-07:00

I have some good Blogs here that I read on a regular basis. There are so many good things on these Blogs. So bookmark them for yourself and read them on a regular basis to get some good hints and money making ideas.

http://pepperclick-general.blogspot.com

http://searchersdelight.blogspot.com

http://blogcharm.com/rainyldays

http://rainyl.blogspot.com

http://wewearit22.blogspot.com

http://wewearit2.blogspot.com

http://chanson09.blogspot.com

http://www.blogcharm.com/Surveys

http://sweettrix.blogspot.com

http://sweettrix-gpttips.blogspot.com

http://diaryofasahmom.blogspot.com

http://boredandbroke.blogspot.com

http://cricketgo-getpaidonline.blogspot.com

http://auzbiz.blogspot.com

http://www.misha-young-millionaire.blogspot.com

http://moneyalamode.blogspot.com

NEW Virus Alert!

2007-08-29T11:33:00.000-07:00

PLEASE

SEND THIS TO EVERYONE ON YOUR CONTACT LIST!!

A new virus has just been discovered that has been classified by
Microsoft as the most destructive ever. This virus was discovered
yesterday afternoon by McAfee . This virus simply destroys Sector Zero
from the hard disk, where vital information for its functioning are
stored.
This virus acts in the following manner:
It sends itself automatically to all contacts on your list with the
title:
"You've received a Post Card from a Family member".

As soon as the supposed virtual card is opened the computer freezes so
that the user has to reboot. When the ctrl+alt+ del keys or the reset
button are pressed, the virus destroys Sector Zero, thus permanently
destroying the hard disk. Yesterday in just a few hours this virus
caused panic in New York , according to news broadcast by CNN.

This alert was received by an employee of Microsoft itself.
So don't open any mails with subject: "A Post Card from . " As soon as
you get the mail, delete it !! Even if you know the sender !!!
Please pass this mail to all of your friends.

Forward this to everyone in your address book. I'm sure most people,
like myself, would rather receive this notice 25 times than not at All

Heres the link on snopes to check it out.
http://www.snopes.com/computer/virus/postcard.asp

Welcome To My New Blog....

2007-08-29T11:28:00.000-07:00

Well I am just getting this new Blog up and running. I hope to find some good and fun things to put on it.
So keep checking back often you never know what you may find here.